Special.

  It's so wonderful when someone makes you feel special.  Maybe it's a girl thing.  But, being loved and needed makes one feel as if they could die right now and everything would somehow work itself out.  The older that I become, the more I don't want to play second fiddle.  I want to be your choice.  I want to be the first person on your mind to talk to after a long day.  I want to be the one that holds you and gives you advise.  I wonder why age is so much a part of not being second?  Perhaps, in my age I am becoming more selfish and more aware of the fact that one day I'll be dead so I better make use of my life-of being alive.  I used to not want to get married, but now I do.  It's hard to explain, but I find it romantic.  Not the aspect of the piece of paper, but of speaking to your signifgant others in regards to committment and telling each other what you think of them, in regards to your love seems really beautiful for me.  I would never have a huge, money draining ceremony either.  Just something very simple that comes from the heart.  Maybe, this will happen one day.  Maybe, someone will get down on one knee and ask me.  Maybe, I'll say yes.  We can only hope that one day, we get what we want and in some many ways I am still dreaming.